February 12, 2009

Wardrobe: A Tight Spot

Ladies can find themselves in a very uncomfortable wardrobe conundrum regarding their stockings. The ones we refuse to throw out, even though they do this every single time. Treacherous back-stabbing garments that fall out of place and slip half way to our knees! What is a girl to do?

Is it Ok to give them a hoist back to your crotch? Is this not what baseball players and other jocks are ridiculed for? Should we draw attention to it by pinching and pulling and squirming? Can we always find a bathroom? As you can see stockings can be terrifying - and unless you can turn your adjustments into a playful strip tease... 

No, you can't ditch the tangling tights, not in the cold months and not in formal-formal situations. They are part of a sometimes nonsensical attire and they ought to stay put. We put up with them struggling in abandoned corners, tugging in restrooms, or trying to just put them out of our minds.